The warm fuzzy feeling of a fresh start is too often compromised by the shadow of past failures. It feels like the heart can’t fully trust that new person, or maybe ourselves. It feels like certain fears have gotten stronger.
If this sounds familiar to you, find out here how to have a bright new beginning.
1] Understand the past
Make a real effort to understand your past. What happened, happened. Be honest about what caused the previous relationship failures and try not to repeat it. This means adjusting your own behavior but also recognizing toxic patterns in partners. Be strong enough to talk about it or to walk away when you see the same faults.
2] Different individuals are… well, different!
He/she may have some things in common with your ex, but this doesn’t mean they are their perfect copy. After all, we are all unique individuals and you can’t go through the exact same kind of relationship this time.
3] Admit your boundaries
When our romantic life is at its beginning, we can endure so much. As we experience more, we learn about how much is healthy for us to tolerate. Know what works for you and what doesn’t.
4] It’s a blank book to be written
Rejoice, you now have a full blank book in your hand, waiting to be written. The content can be wonderful and it’s all at the present and future tense, because it’s in no way connected to your previous ‘books’.
5] Congratulate yourself
This is a new beginning and a chance you somehow earned from life. It’s your next shot, so make the most if it. Allow yourself to feel good because a new relationship is dawning, regardless of all the hurt in the past.
Starting a new relationship is, after all, a gift that is not given to anyone. If you still have a trace of fear left, accept it – it’s only normal.