Would you believe me if I told you that it is possible to increase intimacy in your relationship without having sex? You would probably think, ‘Hey, hold on a minute!’ ‘Is there anything that can ever be more intimate than sex?’ No sex would be equivalent to facing trouble in paradise or at least that is what most people believe.
Sex and intimacy are entirely different things and it is true that intimacy is more influential in maintaining the success of a long-term relationship.
Post the initial heavy and hot stage that is experienced by all couples, when you tend to shave, take shower and brush your teeth before each date, things will cool off gradually. Then comes a stage when you know that you don’t require having sex in order to feel connected and close.
In some relationships, it is just about lying down in bed and sharing past experiences, taking long walks while discussing the primary values in life and snuggling on to each other in the couch. Such interactions and conversations continue on a regular basis.
Although it is true that a round of great sex that satisfies both the partners is vital for leading a successful relation yet it is never the foundation of a relationship. Intimacy is the ultimate key to long-term happiness.
Ways of increasing intimacy without having sex
Now that you know the importance and vitality of intimacy, you must be wondering about the ways in which you can enhance your relational intimacy without involving in sexual intercourse. Here are few ways to watch out for.
-
Touch often
In most long-term relationships, couples often stop touching each other unless they’re having sex. Don’t let this stage come into your relationship. Make it a point that you will touch your partner throughout the day and touching could mean hugs, kissing, running fingers through his hair or even stroking her cheeks.
Also look forward to more intense touching like giving massages to each other. Once you give each other massages, you’ll know that your whole body has an erotic potential and can lead to pleasurable feelings.
-
Behave like a new couple
Do you remember those days when you were beginning to date each other or just falling in love with each other? That was the time when you couldn’t just keep your hands off each other.
You might not be having intercourse all the time but just like that. Try to recreate that feeling all over again. Sit together on the couch and make out and explore different parts of your body from above the clothes.
-
Hold hands when you’re out
Did you ever come across an older couple walking hand in hand with each other? Bet you have smiled looking at them!
Don’t always think that holding hands look good only in your initial dating days as it is something that can let you retain your intimacy and closeness. Even after crossing several decades, you can still remain freshly in love with each other.
-
Involve in having ‘outercourse’
Even without having intercourse, you could experience orgasm! Can you believe this to be true? There are several forms of stimulation and all you have to do is to explore all the newest forms of stimulation. ‘Outercourse’ is a form of sensual activity that doesn’t mean exchanging the body fluids.
-
Know how to be intimate without engaging sexually
If you both share interests, apart from house, kids and pets, this can open up several avenues of intimacy. Has it been years that both of you have engaged in anything more than a movie or a dinner? If answered yes, try developing new interests like playing golf, tennis or biking and skiing.
If you love singing or playing guitar, you can start getting lessons together as these can also be a great way of bonding with each other. The benefits of such common activities can give you immediate pleasure of sharing similar interests.
-
Spend time cuddling each other
Skip the part of sex and move straightaway to the post-sex cuddling session. When you feel the hug of the person you love, this gives you a true feeling of intimacy.
Turn on the background music, soak in the feeling of you and your partner spending time together. Try to appreciate the sound of each other’s heartbeat and breath. Once you involve yourself in this, you will realize how special it can be.
-
Talk about things that are important
What are the most necessary and important conversations for couples when they’re trying their best to make things work? The more serious the conversation will be, the more intimate will be the dialogue.
Start a conversation where you can discuss the most important things with your partner. You can plan out goals for the near future and the things that you expect from your partner. Know the things and the discussions that will help you get closer to each other.
-
Don’t stop talking to each other
There are times when silence between a couple can resemble closeness and comfort. However, at the same time, it can also be a sign that there’s nothing more left to speak about between the both of you. Never let this happen to you.
No matter what is the topic, make sure you keep talking to each other, if not only about regular events, then also about your dreams and thoughts. Share with each other how you felt during the time of intimacy without having intercourse.
The day you stop sharing things will be the day when you’ll know that things have taken a turn towards the worse. Keep the spark alive by sharing everything with each other.
Therefore, while you’re trying your best to increase intimacy without having sexual intercourse, keep a finger on the pulse of your relationship.
If you still think that lack of sexual involvement is not working in your relationship, you should immediately consult a sexual therapist. You have to discuss the reasons why intimacy is not working for both of you and know the actual reasons behind the issues in your relationship.